Scriptures: 2 Samuel 13:30-33, 37-39; 2 Samuel 18:4-17, 33
This week we are wrapping up our series “Insights for Living from the Life of David.” These later years of David’s life, that deal primarily with his home life, are troubling stories – to say the least. Last week, we heard about how David broke almost every single commandment with one incident of lust. Adultery, deceit, murder… that’s how it all came down for David and his affair with Bathsheba.
This week – we are hearing how the repercussions of those actions are being played out in David’s family life. God declared that because of David’s actions, the sword would never leave his family. It would constantly be caught up in turmoil and strife. His sons would learn from their father how to handle situations in life.
The lasting repercussions of David’s sin impacted not just him – but his entire family. In particular, his children.
One of the instances we are told of is so horrific, I don’t know how any parent would react. David, from his tryst with Bathsheba, taught his son’s that if you want a woman – you just take her. His son Amnon learned that behavior just a little too well.
Amnon does the unspeakable and rapes his sister. We don’t talk much about that because it’s a topic that is so disturbing even today, we don’t mention it if we don’t have to. We like to ignore it and pretend it didn’t happen. These aren’t the Sunday School versions of David’s life we like to hear.
The problem is, that’s what David did, too. He ignored the incident. He was furious – but he did nothing. His son Amnon never had to suffer the consequences for his actions… so his other son, Absalom, saw to it his sister’s rape was avenged and killed his brother Amnon.
That’s what happened in our first reading. We learn in that reading that after Absalom killed Amnon, Absalom fled. He wanted to run away from what he knew would be his father’s inevitable anger. And indeed – Absalom spent three years in a self-imposed exile until he was allowed to return to Jerusalem. But it was two more years before David finally could bring himself to speak to his son. He was angry – but he eventually forgave.
Sadly – this story isn’t about a wonderful reunion of father and son. Once Absalom is allowed back into the King’s good graces, he immediately sets about undermining his father, winning over the hearts of the people, and leading a rebellion against David. Our second reading picks up where Absalom has overthrown his father as king over Israel.
Now, most of us would think, “OK, he’s killed his brother – perhaps with good reason – and now he’s overthrown David and is seeking to kill David now. Surely that would cause David to want to seek his own form of vengeance.”
Yet… over and over again, we see David’s biggest redeeming quality come through. We see the one thing his sons SHOULD have learned from him, but didn’t. No matter what any of his kids have done – he still loves them and wishes no harm to come them. His own son wants him dead – and he still tells his generals to deal kindly with him when they find him.
But David finds himself in a bad spot – a spot probably many parents can identify with. Not necessarily to this degree… but I think most parents have found themselves torn between loving their child, not wanting any harm to come to them, and allowing matters to take their course when their child has rebelled and gone down the wrong path.
David finds himself with the ultimate rebellious child. Absalom doesn’t just murder his brother, he openly rebels and supplants his father as the ruler of Israel. It doesn’t get much worse than this.
But if we step outside the story of David and Absalom and see ourselves in this story – who do we usually see ourselves as? Are we David, or are we Absalom? Most parents probably see themselves much like David. Torn between love and discipline.
Yet, we are ALL also just like Absalom. Absalom is representative of how humanity behaves toward God.
If the man after God’s own heart is any reflection at all of God – we begin to see the dilemma that God is in with humanity, the problem God faces with each and every one of us. How we hurt one another. How we rebel against Him and go our own way.
When we read the Old Testament in particular, we tend to judge God’s actions pretty harshly. He seems unusually cruel in some circumstances and something of a tyrant God who demands obedience and offers up stiff penalties for disobeying his commands.
Yet would inaction have been the better course for God throughout the Old Testament? To take a hands-off approach, like how David took no action against Amnon raping David’s daughter? Was that the right and good thing to do, or should Amnon have been punished for his crime? Ultimately, he does get punished, probably much more severely by his brother than the punishment David might have imposed upon him had he been the one to dole it out.
I had a professor one time who referred to the wrath of God as “The puzzling--to human beings--concept that God loves our neighbors so much that God gets angry at us when we do (or don't do) things and cause them to suffer.”
It’s a dilemma. God loves us. He loves our neighbor, too, because they’re His children as well, and when we set out to hurt each other… what’s a Father to do?
We make Him angry because we, as His children, hurt His other children.
Unfortunately, the angry God is sometimes the only picture of God many people have – just like most teenagers think the only mood their parents are ever in is a bad one. They miss the anguished love that is behind it.
If we see David as that man after God’s own heart, then God’s heart has a lot of love for His children. So much love that he doesn’t punish sometimes even when he should, and he continues to allow us to rebel and hurt each other. He allows matters to take their course. He allows our decisions in life to have lasting effects not just on our lives, but our children’s lives as well.
The examples we set – they follow.
So when we look at Amnon and Absalom as examples of humanity – we see what God has to deal with. We see the dilemma. We see the hurt – and the love, that goes along with all of this.
In David, the father and king, we see the grace. A man who experienced forgiveness from God for his sin with Bathsheba. A man who extends that forgiveness to his children when they sin. After all, David was the author of Psalm 103:
“The Lord is merciful and abounding in steadfast love. He will not always accuse, nor will he keep his anger forever. 10 He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. 11 For as the heavens are high above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; 12 as far as the east is from the west, so far he removes our transgressions from us. 13 As a father has compassion for his children, so the LORD has compassion for those who fear him. 14 For he knows how we were made; he remembers that we are dust.”
David knew the depths of God’s love.
Christ also tells us a story that is very similar to that of the story of David and his sons. He tells the story of the prodigal son. The son who rebels and takes his inheritance, squanders it, and then is forced to return home.
While the father had every right to tell the son, “Too bad, so sad,” he throws a feast and welcomes him back home.
If David could ask his generals to deal gently with erring Absalom, how much more does the love of the heavenly Father know no bounds? If it seems undignified to see Christ associating with prostitutes and racketeers, that's how God's undignified love always looks. It looks as undignified as a king like David, who had to flee as a fugitive, but was forgiving as a father. It looks as undignified as a father running wildly down the road to welcome his returning son.
That divine love comes running down among us into the most undignified places! That love came running down to a shepherd boy named David and made him the shepherd of Israel, forgiving him his failures and using him for divine purposes.
Centuries later, in the fullness of time and at the crossroads of the world, God's love came running down into a foul stable at Bethlehem and ended up writhing on a cross at Calvary to show us the heart of the Father.
In this episode in David's life and in the cross of David's greater Son, Christ, we see the awful mysteries of human sinfulness and the depth of love of God as father. How God suffers because of what we do to each other. Yet forgives what we do to each other.
This week we are wrapping up our series “Insights for Living from the Life of David.” These later years of David’s life, that deal primarily with his home life, are troubling stories – to say the least. Last week, we heard about how David broke almost every single commandment with one incident of lust. Adultery, deceit, murder… that’s how it all came down for David and his affair with Bathsheba.
This week – we are hearing how the repercussions of those actions are being played out in David’s family life. God declared that because of David’s actions, the sword would never leave his family. It would constantly be caught up in turmoil and strife. His sons would learn from their father how to handle situations in life.
The lasting repercussions of David’s sin impacted not just him – but his entire family. In particular, his children.
One of the instances we are told of is so horrific, I don’t know how any parent would react. David, from his tryst with Bathsheba, taught his son’s that if you want a woman – you just take her. His son Amnon learned that behavior just a little too well.
Amnon does the unspeakable and rapes his sister. We don’t talk much about that because it’s a topic that is so disturbing even today, we don’t mention it if we don’t have to. We like to ignore it and pretend it didn’t happen. These aren’t the Sunday School versions of David’s life we like to hear.
The problem is, that’s what David did, too. He ignored the incident. He was furious – but he did nothing. His son Amnon never had to suffer the consequences for his actions… so his other son, Absalom, saw to it his sister’s rape was avenged and killed his brother Amnon.
That’s what happened in our first reading. We learn in that reading that after Absalom killed Amnon, Absalom fled. He wanted to run away from what he knew would be his father’s inevitable anger. And indeed – Absalom spent three years in a self-imposed exile until he was allowed to return to Jerusalem. But it was two more years before David finally could bring himself to speak to his son. He was angry – but he eventually forgave.
Sadly – this story isn’t about a wonderful reunion of father and son. Once Absalom is allowed back into the King’s good graces, he immediately sets about undermining his father, winning over the hearts of the people, and leading a rebellion against David. Our second reading picks up where Absalom has overthrown his father as king over Israel.
Now, most of us would think, “OK, he’s killed his brother – perhaps with good reason – and now he’s overthrown David and is seeking to kill David now. Surely that would cause David to want to seek his own form of vengeance.”
Yet… over and over again, we see David’s biggest redeeming quality come through. We see the one thing his sons SHOULD have learned from him, but didn’t. No matter what any of his kids have done – he still loves them and wishes no harm to come them. His own son wants him dead – and he still tells his generals to deal kindly with him when they find him.
But David finds himself in a bad spot – a spot probably many parents can identify with. Not necessarily to this degree… but I think most parents have found themselves torn between loving their child, not wanting any harm to come to them, and allowing matters to take their course when their child has rebelled and gone down the wrong path.
David finds himself with the ultimate rebellious child. Absalom doesn’t just murder his brother, he openly rebels and supplants his father as the ruler of Israel. It doesn’t get much worse than this.
But if we step outside the story of David and Absalom and see ourselves in this story – who do we usually see ourselves as? Are we David, or are we Absalom? Most parents probably see themselves much like David. Torn between love and discipline.
Yet, we are ALL also just like Absalom. Absalom is representative of how humanity behaves toward God.
If the man after God’s own heart is any reflection at all of God – we begin to see the dilemma that God is in with humanity, the problem God faces with each and every one of us. How we hurt one another. How we rebel against Him and go our own way.
When we read the Old Testament in particular, we tend to judge God’s actions pretty harshly. He seems unusually cruel in some circumstances and something of a tyrant God who demands obedience and offers up stiff penalties for disobeying his commands.
Yet would inaction have been the better course for God throughout the Old Testament? To take a hands-off approach, like how David took no action against Amnon raping David’s daughter? Was that the right and good thing to do, or should Amnon have been punished for his crime? Ultimately, he does get punished, probably much more severely by his brother than the punishment David might have imposed upon him had he been the one to dole it out.
I had a professor one time who referred to the wrath of God as “The puzzling--to human beings--concept that God loves our neighbors so much that God gets angry at us when we do (or don't do) things and cause them to suffer.”
It’s a dilemma. God loves us. He loves our neighbor, too, because they’re His children as well, and when we set out to hurt each other… what’s a Father to do?
We make Him angry because we, as His children, hurt His other children.
Unfortunately, the angry God is sometimes the only picture of God many people have – just like most teenagers think the only mood their parents are ever in is a bad one. They miss the anguished love that is behind it.
If we see David as that man after God’s own heart, then God’s heart has a lot of love for His children. So much love that he doesn’t punish sometimes even when he should, and he continues to allow us to rebel and hurt each other. He allows matters to take their course. He allows our decisions in life to have lasting effects not just on our lives, but our children’s lives as well.
The examples we set – they follow.
So when we look at Amnon and Absalom as examples of humanity – we see what God has to deal with. We see the dilemma. We see the hurt – and the love, that goes along with all of this.
In David, the father and king, we see the grace. A man who experienced forgiveness from God for his sin with Bathsheba. A man who extends that forgiveness to his children when they sin. After all, David was the author of Psalm 103:
“The Lord is merciful and abounding in steadfast love. He will not always accuse, nor will he keep his anger forever. 10 He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. 11 For as the heavens are high above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; 12 as far as the east is from the west, so far he removes our transgressions from us. 13 As a father has compassion for his children, so the LORD has compassion for those who fear him. 14 For he knows how we were made; he remembers that we are dust.”
David knew the depths of God’s love.
Christ also tells us a story that is very similar to that of the story of David and his sons. He tells the story of the prodigal son. The son who rebels and takes his inheritance, squanders it, and then is forced to return home.
While the father had every right to tell the son, “Too bad, so sad,” he throws a feast and welcomes him back home.
If David could ask his generals to deal gently with erring Absalom, how much more does the love of the heavenly Father know no bounds? If it seems undignified to see Christ associating with prostitutes and racketeers, that's how God's undignified love always looks. It looks as undignified as a king like David, who had to flee as a fugitive, but was forgiving as a father. It looks as undignified as a father running wildly down the road to welcome his returning son.
That divine love comes running down among us into the most undignified places! That love came running down to a shepherd boy named David and made him the shepherd of Israel, forgiving him his failures and using him for divine purposes.
Centuries later, in the fullness of time and at the crossroads of the world, God's love came running down into a foul stable at Bethlehem and ended up writhing on a cross at Calvary to show us the heart of the Father.
In this episode in David's life and in the cross of David's greater Son, Christ, we see the awful mysteries of human sinfulness and the depth of love of God as father. How God suffers because of what we do to each other. Yet forgives what we do to each other.
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